Review of The Bodyguard by Katherine Center: An Exercise in Deflation
When I picked up The Bodyguard by Katherine Center, I had high hopes. I’ve often found joy in light-hearted romances that promise snappy banter and endearing characters. However, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I should have left this one on the shelf. As I read the first line—“MY MOTHER’S DYING wish was for me to take a vacation”—I knew I was in for a ride, and not the fun kind. Let’s talk about what went wrong, shall we?
Characters and Plot Elements
At the center of this troubled narrative is Hannah, our supposedly tough-as-nails bodyguard with a second-degree black belt in jiu jitsu. Yet, somehow, she screams when a cow licks her arm. Talk about a lack of backbone! Between her ex, her boss, and her best friend, Hannah allows everyone to walk all over her, including the actor she’s supposed to protect, Jake—who, to be honest, felt more like a dull piece of toast than a romance hero. If I’m going to be rooting for a relationship, I’d appreciate a little chemistry; alas, their romance felt about as exciting as watching paint dry.
The plot doesn’t fare much better. It revolves around a fake-dating trope that is so poorly executed that it left me questioning why it was even necessary. The tension feels forced, especially when Jake yells at Hannah for not knowing the dangers of a local river—like, honey, she’s not from your rural Texas bubble. Honestly, the premise started as quirky but devolved into a mishmash of clichés and confusion.
Writing Style and Pacing
If the characters were a letdown, the writing is even more polarizing. Center attempts quirky fourth-wall breaks that come off as painfully awkward rather than fun. I found myself cringing instead of chuckling when Hannah suddenly addressed me directly: “HAVE I EXPLAINED what I do for a living?” Um, no, and I didn’t really want the exposition to break the flow of the story. The pacing felt uneven—juggling a lackluster plot with poorly developed romance left me frustrated rather than engrossed.
Memorable Quotes
“There’s a long list of assumptions about me…and all of them will be wrong.” The irony of this sentence is not lost on me; perhaps if the book had aimed higher, we’d find a more compelling narrative. On that note, Jake’s backhanded compliments about Hannah being “the epitome of ordinary” dampen any sense of romance rather than build it. Who needs a knight in shining armor when you have a man reminding you of your insecurities?
Conclusion
In the end, I can’t help but feel like the biggest hater for giving The Bodyguard that single star. It’s hard to recommend this book to anyone unless you enjoy reading about irritating characters meandering through a plot that lacks both stakes and substance. If you’re looking for a romance that brightens your day, you’d be better off searching elsewhere. My advice? Skip the trip to Ohio and find a book that knows how to deliver an engaging story instead.